Think about the reason
for your mental un-restlessness or the anxiety building up. When life
throws in challenges at people, it is more important for us to hold our
grounds and stay strong during these periods. But all of your mental
balance depends on the kind of people that you surround yourself with.
As Jim Rohn sums it up best, you become what you surround yourself with.
Very much like the story of the spoilt apple kept in tow with a bunch
of other fresh apples that we’ve been told our entire childhood, there
are significant impacts on keeping some kinds of people close to you.
There are some people who
are happy for your successes or progress and genuinely take an interest
in your problems while there are the ones who are opportunistic and
only stay close as long as they feel your need for their purpose. The
importance of identifying the people around you and staying away from
the commotion which will only mentally unstable you is immense.
Intentionally or sometimes not, toxic people are the ones who drain you
out mentally and emotionally to an extent where you revert to
self-pitying and self-doubting.
Keep away from these 7 Toxic people in your life
How do you identify these class of people who make you feel
miserable, which is sometimes distinct but not always? How do you steer
clear of these toxic people in your life? Here are the 7 types of toxic
people that you must try to keep away, at least during your down time,
while you rejuvenate.
The Naysayers
Another word for the negative people. I’ve come across naysayers and
from what I can tell, some of the times these people are just being
realistic while others simply don’t want to see you succeed. Whatever
may be the case, simply keep these naysayers out of your life no matter
what. Negativity breeds self-doubt and self-loathing, which is never a
healthy thing for your mind. While you may believe that it is the
naysayers that make people go and achieve things and prove the naysayers
wrong, not always are you needed to prove yourself to someone else.
If you believe in the beauty of your dreams and work for it, there is
no need of these people to bring you down to earth. One way I deal with
naysayers is I try to identify any potential loopholes and not the
obvious ones that I fail to see in my ideas or beliefs. But it sometimes
sticks behind the back of your brain and it becomes harder to ignore
the negativity that you received in the past for your ideas or thoughts.
One simple way to keep the naysayers keep out of your life is to not
let them know what you’re thinking or working on until you get it done
unless of course it is your boss! Remember the saying, “
Work hard in silence, let success speak for itself.”
The False Positives
Not very much different than the naysayers, but probably more
dangerous. The naysayers, at least, say what they mean directly to your
face where the false positives resort to different means. These people
are the ones who intentionally don’t want you to succeed and only heap
false praises in your presence. They are the ones who are most likely to
sulk in your success and they are the ones you must steer clear
immediately once identified. The false positives will tell you how much
they are happy for your new job, your new car or your new house but
really deep inside, they loathe you and envious of you.
These are the people who wear their mask everywhere and they never
mean what they say. These are also the people who happen to be some of
the worst gossipers as they are more interested about others than
themselves. No good will come from the false positives and their uncanny
ability to composedly throw in negativity at others in a subtle
fashion, easily make them worth keeping the distance.
The ones who disrupt your ‘Me’ time
Not as toxic as the two types of people mentioned above, but
nonetheless, need to be taken care of. Most of the people need their
alone time and no matter how extroverted, the mind needs some time for
itself. This is what is commonly referred to as ‘Me time’. This is the
time for yourself and you alone. No best friend or someone even very
close gets to disrupt your ‘Me time’. Worst are the people who still
revert back to purposely disturbing you during your ‘Me time’, even
after you mentioning them to keep away.
I’ve heard extroverted people say that they do not need downtime or
alone time to replenish and that they enjoy the company of people. While
that may be fairly true, you do not get productive by simply having the
company of people. If someone who is not working towards the same cause
as yours attempts to disrupt your ‘Me time’, you simply need to steer
clear of these kinds of people, at least temporarily. If you happen to
be an introvert or someone who tends to be the most productive when left
alone, this is something you can effortlessly relate to.
The Grouchy Moaners
Different from the naysayers and the false positives in a way
entirely of their own. The grouchy moaners are the ones who complain a
lot, about everything and everyone. They try to make themselves and
those around them feel good by sugar-coating the situation and putting
the blame onto the shoulders of others. Couldn’t get good grades? well,
it was the professor’s fault. From the weather to the 40-hour workweek
to the traffic and the Mondays, there is nothing that would stop these
people!
Failure to take responsibility for their situations and circumstances
in life is what makes these kinds of people toxic. Blaming their luck
or others for their unfortunate situations in life is something you
would come across very often when in the company of a grouchy moaner.
Long company of these people will turn you into a similar complainer and
soon you will stop taking responsibility of your actions. Steer clear
of these grouchy moaners and take complete responsibility of your life
into your hands.
The Judgemental
These are the people who will judge you and everyone for everything
that you go and do. Do or don’t, the judgemental have a unique
perspective angle which will make them see everyone in equally negative
angles. Identifying these people is very easy as you can easily tell by
the way they talk to you about others. If they are too judgemental of
everyone else when around you, they might be doing the same thing to you
when you’re not around.
People are often quick to jump to conclusions but that simply doesn’t
make one judgemental. Severe and repeated criticism of everything that
does not match up to their own tastes and beliefs is what makes one a
judgemental. Someone different from themselves or their views is looked
down upon by these people. Due to poor listening or due to being
close-minded, their judgementalism is definitely something you would not
want to look up to.
The Control freaks
While similar to the judgementalism in many ways, the control freaks
are more proactive than their counterparts. These are perfectly
closed-minded people who not only reject the ideas and thoughts of
others but also make an attempt to make others disown their notions.
These people are the ones who like the idea of manipulating others in
the way they please to. They want to be in control of anything and
everything that involves others. Simple lack of consideration of others,
the control freaks are toxic both in business and in personal
relationships.
The control freaks will always try to manipulate the thoughts and
feelings of others and substitute it with their own feelings and beliefs
of things. Advice from these people would be disastrous as they’ve
thought about it from their own point of view and not yours. No one
likes to be manipulated on every turn of life by someone who has little
to no interest about you and it is time to steer clear of these people.
The Lazy souls
Although I’m highly appreciative of the lazy souls who always find a
better way to do things, there are many different kinds of lazy. Every
one of us wants to succeed and the stories of the Ellison’s, Gates and
the Zuckerberg’s compel us to want to succeed even more. There is
absolutely nothing wrong in wanting to succeed, but the lazy souls you
need to steer clear are the ones who want to succeed but won’t make an
effort in doing so.
The lazy souls you need to steer clear of are the ones who don’t
believe in the beauty of their dreams and won’t work towards realizing
them. These are the people who will always talk about ideas, but forget
the very notion that it is people who make them come to life. They will
effortlessly come up with great new ideas, but won’t work on them
towards their realization. The laziness of this kind is contagious and
something that you must keep yourselves away from.
Whatever you do, make sure that you try
your best to keep these kinds of toxic people away from your life. It
might happen that many people you know might fall into these categories,
but you deserve the best for yourselves, don’t you?
